May 5th to most people is Cinco De Mayo. A Holiday to celebrate Mexican heritage, take swings at a pinata full of candy and munch on chips and salsa.
May 5th to me is so much more. It is the day my baby brother Trevor was born into this world and for the past 24 years that is all it has ever been to me. A day that we spend together as a family to celebrate Trevor. Strawberry shortcake, Taco Bell, and the Jazz in the playoff running is all Trev ever wanted for his birthday. I remember the day very vividly from three years ago when we celebrated Trevor’s 21st birthday as a family. This would be the last Birthday I would ever spend with my brother on this earth and it truly was the perfect day.
Since Trevor’s death in October 2009 I have grown, matured and changed immensely in every single aspect of my life. I have learned to focus on the bigger picture, to never take anything for granted, and to hold on tight and love and serve those I care about most with all of my heart. If I had to define the way Trevor’s death has helped me flourish and cope the most I would use one very small five letter word: Faith.
“Keep your dreams alive. Understand to achieve anything requires faith and belief in yourself, vision, hard work, determination, and dedication. Remember all things are possible for those who believe.” Gail Devers
I woke up on May 5th and reflected on Trevor’s short lived but hugely impacting life and I was overcome with love and faith. As I jogged up to the starting line of the race tears fell down my cheeks as I thought about how lucky I was just to be running on my brothers birthday and how no matter what happened it was still going to be a very special day. I did not feel nervous at all because I knew that whatever happened in the race didn’t really matter and the most important thing was that I was enjoying the moment and running for Trevor.
Since the race was almost a week ago I have forgotten a lot of the details but you can click here to read the re-cap on my training blog. My splits were 6:09, 6:22, 6:20, .43 seconds for the last .1. 19:35/6:18 pace and 3rd female overall. It was triumphant and exciting to throw my hands in the air, see my parents screaming and running towards me, and to know for a fact that Trevor was right there beside me. I felt his presence stronger that day in that very moment than I have felt in a long time and I don’t ever want to forget that feeling.
I had faith and believed in my abilities to run sub-20 on May 5th 2012. I also have faith that I will see my brother again and I can only imagine that just like crossing that finish line it will be magical. Everything in my life, no matter how hard to comprehend or understand at the time happens for a reason and I have faith that great things will continue to take place as long as I continue to believe. When life gets hard I don’t want to complain or give up I just want to work harder because as long as I am dedicated and determined with faith everything else will fall into place.
After the race I was able to run the last 7 miles of the marathon with Julia and then my family spent the rest of the day celebrating Trevor’s Birthday.
May 5th will always be a special day to me and running sub-20 on such an important day was really just the icing on the already perfect cake.